he wants to bone in the snuggie
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
