Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
Is it because I queefed?
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
