can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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