I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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