Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
