My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
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