On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
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