there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
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