i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
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