shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize