Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize