Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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