He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Randomize