Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
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