we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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