she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
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you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
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just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
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