I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
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