Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I seem to have left my pride at pride
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
