I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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