Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Randomize
