I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize