I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Randomize
