Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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