I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize
