I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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