youre lurking in front of me
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
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