even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
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