so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
How external is "for external use only"?
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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