you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
