id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Randomize
