i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize