The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
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You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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