I will die if light touches me.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Slut skills are useful in every country.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
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