Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
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