butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Randomize