i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
