Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
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