my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize