So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
You are the jesus of drinking
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
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