where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
