yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Randomize
