how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
