vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
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