How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
25 Porn Addicts Admit Their Biggest Pet Peeves
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?