butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
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