She's JV to your varsity
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
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