Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
