i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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