Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Nicole vs. Life
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I want to fling myself into the sun
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
