im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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