Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Randomize